Zack Greinke, that is: the best pitcher in the major leagues right now. Here’s an “unofficial top ten” Zack Greinke quotes, passed on from Royals Corner[*1] by the Kansas City Star’s Royals Blog[*2] :

10. “I could hit me if someone were on base. It wouldn’t be easy, but I could do it. If no one were on base, I wouldn’t care as much, so I could get me out.”

9. Upon hearing then-Royals GM Allard Baird was going to watch him throw: “And you’re gonna be impressed,”

8. “I’d say the average person wouldn’t eat a Chipotle burrito and still do his running, full speed, like me. That’s why they call me special.”

7. “I was giving (Royals pitcher) Brian Bannister all the credit for being the best-hitting pitcher on the team, until today. Now, I’ve got my confidence back. They’re throwing me sliders, and it doesn’t matter.”

6. “For the first month of the season, (young, big-hitting Royal Billy Butler) has definitely been an above-average first baseman. That’s hard for me to say because I never thought anyone would say that but him and his family.”

5. Two years ago, with (young Royal 3rd baseman) Alex Gordon struggling, Greinke pulled him into the video room to show him a clip of Greinke hitting his home run. “In case you forgot,” Greinke said, “this is what a home run looks like.”

4. “Nice effort by the defense. They didn’t get tired of running after balls to the wall. I was pretty impressed by that.”

3. To (former Royals reliever) Jeremy Affeldt after Affeldt gave up a homer on what he thought was a good pitch. “Really, I went back to the clubhouse and looked at the pitch on video. It was a really bad pitch. Right over the middle of the plate, and you got it up. I mean it was a bad pitch.”
Affeldt: “Thanks, Zack.”
Zack: “Right down the middle. I could have hit it out.”
Affeldt: “Thanks, Zack.”
Zack: “Yeah.”

2. On making the Sports Illustrated cover: “There’s a lot more interesting stuff going on right now. They should have something else on the cover. Playoff basketball or something else. So it’s a mistake. They’ll probably sell their least amount of magazines in a long time — except when NASCAR was on the cover.”

1. On hoping President Obama would cuss him out at the All-Star game: “Because none of the White Sox guys like me. So I was hoping that he’d recognize me and be like, ‘You punk, I hate you.’ But he didn’t do that.”

Zack Greinke was the only thing that could get me out to a Royals game the last third of the season. Even the Friday night fireworks couldn’t do it.