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Poopypants, again (from Dorky Gizzardfanny)

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OK, here we go.  I got this (cut/pasted in its entirety) in my e-mail today:
Subject: RE: Dinky Pottychunks


MY NEW NAME IS IN THE SUBJECT.....DON'T LAUGH UNTIL YOU FIND OUT WHAT YOUR
NEW NAME IS!!

We all need a little stress-reliever! This only takes a minute.

Please don't be a bore & ruin it. Send it on to everyone you know including
the person that sent it to you.

Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to
break up the day. If we are honest, we have a lot more stressful days than
not.

Here is your dose of humor...

A. Follow the instructions to find your new
name.

B. Once you have your new name, put it in the
subject box and forward it to friends and
family & co-workers.

Don't for get to forward it back to the person who sent it to you
so they know you participated.

And don't go all adult - a senior manager is now known far & wide as Dorky
Gizzardsniffer!

The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants And
the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil
Professor forces everyone to assume new names...

So:-

1. Use the third letter of your first name to
determine your New first name:

a = snickle
b = doombah
c = goober
d = cheesey
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = dumbo
h = farcus
i = dorky
j = doofus
k = funky
l = boobie
m = sleezy
n = sloopy
o = fluffy
p = stinky
q = slimy
r = dorfus
s = snooty
t = tootsie
u = dipsy
v = sneezy
w = liver
x = skippy
y = dinky
z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your middle name to determine the first half of
your new last name:

a = dippin
b = feather
c = batty
d = burger
e = chicken
f = barffy
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = farkle
j = monkey
k = flippin
l = fricken
m = bubble
n = rhino
o = potty
p = hamster
q = buckle
r = gizzard
s = lickin
t = snickle
u = chuckle
v = pickle
w = hubble
x = dingle
y = gorilla
z = girdle

3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of
your new last name:

a = butt
b = boob
c = face
d = nose
e = hump
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = head
l = tush
m = chunks
n = dunkin
o = brains
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = doodle
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = sprinkles
v = frack
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = hiney
z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is: Fluffy Chucklefanny.

Now when you SEND THIS ON...use your new name as the subject.

And remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day; adults laugh
an average of 4 times a day.

You know, I don't think I am under sufficient stress to warrant something like Dorky Gizzardfanny . . .

My lovely wife Snookums is, of course, Sloopy Dippinchunks, which my eyes insist on reading as Sloppy Dippinchunks . . .

Oh, and for future reference, George W. (Walker) Bush is Fluffy Dippinfanny, not Fluffy Chucklefanny (Unless, of course, you think his middle name is "Dubya").